The Gilded Margin

One thing from last weekend’s sermon at Milestone has been stuck in my head all week.

The pastor said,

“It’s good to hold on to one thing without letting go of the other.”

He was pointing us to Ecclesiastes 7:18, but I kept thinking about how different that is from what we hear every day.

Our culture is constantly telling us to let go.

Let go of the past.

Let go of people.

Let go of your pain.

Let go and move on.

And while I do think there are things God asks us to release—bitterness, unforgiveness, resentment, the need to control everything—I don’t think He asks us to let go of everything.

Some things we’re supposed to carry.

That was the part that really challenged me.

The pastor talked about pain. And honestly, it made me realize how universal it is.

Every single one of us knows what it feels like to hurt.

Sometimes people hurt us.

Sometimes we lose someone we love.

Sometimes our bodies don’t work the way we hoped they would.

Sometimes it’s financial stress.

Sometimes it’s losing a job.

Sometimes it’s watching someone you love struggle.

Living is hard.

Not because we’re doing something wrong, but because we live in a broken world.

Then we looked at Matthew 14.

John the Baptist had just been killed, and Jesus received the news.

The first thing He did was get in a boat and try to be alone.

I don’t blame Him.

If you’ve ever lost someone or carried heavy news, you know that feeling. Sometimes you just want quiet.

But the crowds followed Him.

And when He got off the boat, Scripture doesn’t say He became impatient or told everyone to come back another day.

It says He had compassion on them.

That hit me.

Jesus didn’t stop grieving.

He didn’t pretend He wasn’t hurting.

He also didn’t stop loving people.

He carried both.

Maybe that’s what Ecclesiastes is trying to teach us.

Maybe maturity isn’t learning how to stop feeling.

Maybe it’s learning what to hold onto and what to surrender.

Hold onto hope.

Let go of bitterness.

Hold onto compassion.

Let go of revenge.

Hold onto faith.

Let go of the illusion that we can control everything.

I don’t know about you, but I need that reminder.

I’ve spent plenty of seasons thinking that healing meant forgetting.

Or that moving forward meant pretending something didn’t matter anymore.

I’m learning that’s not always true.

Sometimes healing looks like remembering without being consumed.

Sometimes faith looks like carrying grief and gratitude at the same time.

Sometimes you can miss someone and still laugh.

Sometimes you can be hurting and still show kindness to someone else.

Jesus did.

And if He could hold grief and compassion in the same hands, maybe that’s what He’s teaching us to do too.

So this week, instead of asking yourself, “What do I need to let go of?”

Maybe ask,

“What is God asking me to hold onto?”

Because not everything is meant to be released.

Some things—hope, love, compassion, faith—are worth holding onto with everything we’ve got.

Inspired by: The July 12, 2026, message at Milestone Church. While the sermon sparked this week’s reflection, this article represents my own personal thoughts, study, and application of Scripture.